Sorrento 2014 - Day 4 - Pool Time and Mahogany Madge

Weather beautiful. 26c of glorious sunshine. Only one thing we could do today and that was nothing. Nothing that is whilst lying around the pool and eating lunch. The pool area is set away from the hotel in the middle of a lush green wooded area which also contains various days beds and 3, yes 3, hot tubs. Stanwick crew take note.

Full waiter service to your sun lounger included. I usually wait until 11:00 before ordering the first beer of the day. Today I had my own personal server who had taken it upon herself to pick up a couple of cold ones on the way back from the loo!

The lunch/ bar area is at one end. All the lunches for the hotel are served here. Wood burning oven and large grill provide the freshest of pizzas and grilled fish/meats. Salads are plentiful. You can order wine or Prossecco by the bottle (all inclusive remember) and delivered to your table with ice bucket. Both Mrs CT and I agree that is the best meal of the day.

Today's over indulgence at the aforementioned lunch resulted in us seeking shelter from the sun and somewhere comfortable for an afternoon snooze. One heart shaped day bed was just the ticket. After a couple of hours I awoke to find Mrs CT reading and complaining that her sleep had been interrupted by Vesuvius type snoring which had scared off all the wildlife. Oops!

Talking of wildlife here are couple of little reptiles that have shared our spot poolside.

So no complaints then. Well.......when there are this many people in a small area there is always going to be someone or something that grates. The average age of resident in this adults only hotel at this time of year is considerably more than my svelte youthfulness of 51. Apart from them all sitting around moaning about the youth of today, benefits scroungers and various residents of the UK who were not born there, naturally there was going to be one who stood out. Let me introduce you to Mahogany Madge.

Mahogany from the perma colour and Madge from her namesake in the ITV series Benidorm. Holding court each day down in "her" corner of the pool. "Ooh we get up early to get our own beds". Although she has no mobility scooter she does have 2 walking sticks that she lets everyone know she cannot do without......rubbish. Faster than a 10 year old sometimes and can stand for 2 hours at a time. Pity the person who gets in her way however...you would think murder against disabled people was being committed. At night time her preferred tipple is half pints of Baileys and Brandy, no wonder she is a little unsteady!

Mrs CT made me put that last picture in. Yes it's a cat. Laters

Tenerife 2012 Day 5 - National noise levels & lizards

Staying at a multi-national hotel is always interesting and I have to say far more pleasant than a UK only establishment.

We are always quite prepared for the individual quirkiness of each nationality and not forgetting the Brits have quite a few of their own.

This hotel is 70% Spanish, 20% French, 9% English & 1% German.

The French are aloof and stylish as always, the Germans very reserved due to the minority (the fact that there is an abundance of sunbeds is ruining their early morning entertainment) and the English are in the main old.

This leaves the Spanish who are as noisy as ****. Talking at 98db even when they are sitting only metres apart, with wild arm gesturing you would think there is a riot underway.

However, the Brits, not to be outdone, have brought in the cavalry in the form of a couple of Geordie families. You have never heard so much bullshit, and at head numbing volume, being spoken in and around the pool. Mrs CT and I are now on operation "Avoid sitting near to or having to talk to the Geordies"

Lizards on the other hand, are nice quiet and gentle creatures. Here is one that came to say hello this morning.

"Ooh that's massive!" exclaimed Mrs CT. I just wish she always got that excited upon viewing something that is obviously no bigger than 6 inches.